flying objects
by Bones on the brain
Summary: the J-team have some fun throwing thing around all squint squad and parker cutness some chapters are ooc. review are love ppl plz R
1. food fight

Flying objects

Flying objects

Food fight

The Jeffersonion team were eating lunch quietly in the cafeteria they couldn't go out to lunch because a local school had brought their students by and the teacher had been held back at security so the team got stuck baby sitting, parker was one of the students so bones and booth were watching him.

"Daddy when can we go look at the dinosaurs" parker started fidgeting

"Soon bud, we have to wait for your teachers to get back" he sighed he loved his but he could be really annoying, he was supposed to go out with bones for lunch but that wasn't happening now, was it. NO

"I could take parker there and back before his teachers find out" Booth looked appalled

"No bones he could get suspended if you do that" she just shrugged

"I never got suspended so neither would parker" parker had gotten bored so he went over to his friends while his dad and Dr. Bones bickered

"Hey guys are you bored too?" parker asked his friends

"Ah ha why don't we have a um" Luke one of parkers friends looked around "Have a food fight"

"No way Dr. Bones would kill us and daddy" he looked over at them they were still bickering

"come on I'll say it was my idea its better then been bored out of our brains" they all nodded and grabbed so food the first burger flow and hit Brennan in the back of the head

"Oh no were in trouble now" parker screeched Brennan swung around in her chair with anger in her eyes

"Okay who threw that" she got up and everyone stared at her, booth couldn't help but laugh "hey that is not funny" she glared at him and picked up her pudding and slapped it on top of his head. She burst out laughing as booth licked off the pudding dripping passed his mouth

"That's good, try some" he through his pudding at her it hit her right in the face

Soon everyone had food and was throwing it in every direction burgers to the left pudding to the right WOW

"Sweetie what made you start a food fight?" questioned Angela trying to avoid getting hit by any flying food

"I didn't someone throw a burger at me and booth started laughing" she looked across the room for booth but instead saw parker and his friends with a pile of burgers. "No I think parker started it" Angela looked in the same direction as Tempe

"me too" just then cam came in and saw the food fight she got really angry when a burger hit her in the chest and the sloppy mixture in side went down her top

"Every one FREEZE" she shouted at the top of her voice everyone stopped in their tracks and looked at her like she was a strict principle "okay who started this" she stared at every one "if you tell me now no one else will be punished" parker nudged his friend but he didn't say any thing "I'm going to count down from five if no one owns up by then all workers at the Jeffersonion will be suspended and all school students will be dealt with by their teachers, five, four, three ,two ….?" Brennan stood up and walked towards cam

"I did cam, I throw a pudding at booth" she looked back at every one then at the floor

"Dr. Brennan you know I already don't like you so I have no problem firing you" Brennan looked up and nodded

"You do know that the Jeffersonion will never succeed again if you firer me right"

"I'm willing to make that sacrifice any way zack can take your position, he is qualified" she looked at zack who had been sitting in the corner the whole time "go clean out your office, NOW" she shouted and everyone including Brennan gasped

Later on in the day Brennan was just about to leave when parker came back from the tour and ran up to her "Dr Bones I'll tell cam that me and my friends started it so you can keep your job"

"parker she hates me so I'll get fired sooner or later any way, but you can try" parker ran off to cams office five minuets later she was screaming stuff like 'you were a guest here and you decided to start throwing food at people' 'you should really have some manners' 'hasn't your farther taught you anything'

Soon Brennan had her job back, but cam was keeping a close eye on her and parker got detention for two days.


	2. stapplers dont fly

Flying objects

Flying objects

Staplers don't fly

"Whoa bones what the hell, that could off hit me" booth duck as a stapler came flying in his direction "what are you doing?"

"Arrgh someone put a ton of staplers in my office and I can't find that file you need if I don't find it we could be slit up" that caught booth attention and he jump in to her office and started digging throw them

"Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow, they hurt" he caught his hand and stuffed it in his mouth "I'm bleeding!"

"Don't be such a big baby you're an FBI agent remember" she started throwing staplers out the door again, they flow over the platform over the balcony some even went out the window "FREK arrgh god all mighty, I give up"

"Bones if we can just get all these staplers out then we can find the file ok" she nodded and breathed deep, then they both started throwing the staplers again

Angela who was walking to the platform saw the staplers and looked very confused

"Staplers don't fly, do they? NO they don't, then why? I'm going made"

Car alarms houses alarms and screaming people littered the street the were trying to run away from the staplers that were coming from the sky

The news that night reported numerous injuries near the Jeffersonion institute due to flying office supplies, Hodgins laughed to himself as he watch the news "hey Angela did you see this" Angela came in to the lounge where jack was sitting

"What? So there really was staplers I'm not going mad thank god jack I thought you were contagious" she looked at the television "were do they come from?"

"I put them in Brennan's this morning as a joke; she got mad and throws them out the window, funny huh"

They both laughed and watch the rest of the news once again the Jeffersonion had made the head lines.


	3. when pigs fly

What if Angela would only marry Hodgins when pigs fly

What if Angela would only marry Hodgins when pigs fly?

Flying objects

When pigs fly

"Jack listen to me I'll marry you when pigs fly ok I still love you but you know when pigs fly ok" she tried to let him down easy but it didn't go so well

"I'll see about that" Hodgins left to find zack "hey zack I've got a job for you and I think you'll like it, come on" Hodgins and zack went out side to prepare

Angela hadn't seen Hodgins all day and was afraid she hurt his feelings so she went to look for zack if anyone zack would know where he was "zack do you know where Hodgins is?"

"Um no if I did I would tell but I don't so I can't because I don t know where Hodgins is"

"You know something, tell me, NOW!" she stood right in front of zack glaring at him

"He's at the airport I don't know why but that's where he is"

What? Why? God is he leaving me cos I wouldn't marry him" she raced off to the airport to find Hodgins standing by a one of his planes with '_what is that…. A PIG what?' _Angela thought strangely to herself

"Hey Ange look I can make a pig fly" he was about to get in the plane when Angela interrupted him

"Sorry jack a plane doesn't count, I thought you were leaving me"

"I would never do that I love you" they headed back to the limo "but I'm going to make a pig fly" he muttered the last part to him self

Back at the lab Hodgins was getting his second attempt at a flying pig ready "zack stay still now wait here I'm going to get Angela" Hodgins ran off and left zack hanging from the ceiling dressed like a pig "okay Angela come this way, stop great open your eyes"

"What am I looking at?" Hodgins walked over to a control and pressed forward and so zack come whizzing from one side of the ceiling to the other and back dressed as a pig

"Oh my god jack is that zack?"

"Yeah, so he still looks like a pig so it counts"

"Sorry baby it doesn't a pig will never fly, but nice try, you look good as a pig zack" and she walked away yet again, Hodgins let zack down and tried to think but nothing came

"What if you use a frozen pig in a cannon, she won't know the difference"

Hodgins ran after Angela while zack went to set up the pig cannon

"okay Angela last time I promise, but you have to be fair okay, three, two, one FIRE" there was a loud bang and then as promised the pig did fly for at least seven meters until it blew up "oh pigs, god Dammit." Angela had to laugh at his effort

"Yes jack" he looked at her confused "…. Yes I'll marry you" he started to jump up and down.

"GOD I LOVE PIGS" he shouted around the lab

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Purely hodgela people, please review it makes my funny bone work (get ha ha ha)

xoxoxox BOTB xoxoxox


	4. squints shouldn't fly

i don't own bones or rockstar by nickleback

For this one-shot non of the squints like flying okay plz R&R

Flying objects

Squints shouldn't fly

"Booth you know I don't like planes" bones had already began to criticise Booth

"Yeah what ever but listen we have to solve this case it's only a short flight to Vermont okay" she just rolled her eyes at him

"Come to think of it none of my team likes planes, so we've got a problem because I need them to solve the case"

"Bones I'm sure you could solve this case with your eyes shut"

"Fine maybe I could but I want my team with me, poor things wouldn't last a minute alone with Cam, she'd eat them alive" she laughed slightly at her self "hey I just made a pun"

"Right go talk to Cullen" he looked at her she didn't look as happy as she was a minute ago

"I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me"

"I think your right" he smirked "so are you and the squint squad going to come"

"I'll talk to them but it won't be pretty zack gets motion sick easily"

"But he can look at dead bodies all day, that boy is just plane weird"

Soon enough all the squints were gathered at the air port it took quite so time to get zack to agreed, but just tell jack and Angela they were getting a paid vacation with a private room and they were in even though they hated planes.

"So what ones ours G-man" Hodgins looked at all the huge planes

"Um…. That one" their jaws dropped as they stared at the miniature plane

"We can't go on that! this is going to be harder than I thought, I hate small planes"

"Come on bones it's only a plane" he looked at the rest of the squints and they didn't look…. Good at all.

Eventually they were all seated on the plane and they were ready to take off

"were about to take off so sit back and relax we'll be landing in Vermont shortly" the pilots voice rang out through the plane, and they were off

"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!" Angela

Started screaming and wouldn't stop

"Angela, stop screaming!" booth yelled back

"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH…. No I **hate** heights, I wanna get off Booth I wanna get off NOW!" she tried to stand up but got to scared

"Calm down just close your eyes, Bones why didn't you tell me this would happen"

"I tried too you wouldn't listen" Brennan had taken hold of Booth's arm when the plane had taken off

"Bones, Angela stop now, Oh god Zack" zack started too throw up in the chair in front of Booth

"I through of standing in line for clubs I'll never get in, it's like the bottom of the ninth and I'm never gonna win this life hasn't turned out quite the way I want it to be." hodgins sang

"Hodgins stop singing, what the hell is going on?" he looked over at Brennan again and she was mumbling something

"Humorous, radius, ulna, phalanges' femur, tibia, fibula, metacarpals." She was saying all the bones in the body to try calm her-self down

"God all mighty Bones stop it, Zack you can't be that motion sick, Angela you're giving me a head ache and Hodgins you can't sing"

"I want a brand new house on an episode of cribs a bathroom I can play baseball in, and a king size tub big enough for ten plus me. HEY that's not nice"

"Ribs, breast bone, vertebrae yes I concur."

The plane started to decline and land as soon as it hit ground Brennan stopped mumbling, Hodgins stopped singing, Angela stopped screaming and zack stopped well you don't want all the details on what zack was doing but he stopped

"ARRRRRRRRRRRGH, Hey were here" Angela smiled

"Hey, hey I wanna be a rock star yeah, yeah I wanna, cool dude were in Vermont

"Uggggggh, I'm hungry can we get some food?" zack had stopped gagging

"Mandible, now lets get to that crime scene shall we" Brennan stood up to leave

"WHAT THE HELL?" Booth looked utterly confused

"Come on Booth, the way you are acting you'd think that you hated planes"

"And to think we have to come back again" Booth shook his head and sighed

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Hodgins was singing Rockstar by nickleback

I think that fit the squints don't you please review (it helps my funny bone)

R&R plz


	5. spider bones

Okay here's a really short chap

Okay here's a really short chap. For you. Bones belongs to fox not me (brakes down crying) boo hoo

Climb spidy bones climb

It's Halloween again and since her wonder woman costume had been destroyed last year, Brennan was going as a sexy spider woman (Angela leant it to her) Angela was a cabaret singer, who couldn't sing, Hodgins was dressed as an…. Alien, zack a donkey ass (not cow's ass, donkey's ass) Cam a cat (not cat woman, an actual fury cat that goes meow, meow) sweets was dressed as a…. lolly pop and Booth a knight in shining armour.

The party started of pretty well but when Brennan went to get a fake skeleton from the basement, a HUGE spider bite her wrist and she started to feel funny, but she ignored it.

The party finished and the squints and Booth were all cleaning up, everything on the floor was cleaned up but they couldn't reached the streamers Brennan and Angela went up on the balcony and tried to lean over, Brennan slipped and slid down the wall until she tried to grab it with her hands and they immediately stuck.

She was climbing the wall like a spider.

"WOAH Dr. Brennan that's awesome" sweets yelled

"Bones your climbing a wall" Booth king of stating the obvious

"Dr. B you're a freak!"

"OH my god" both Angela and cam screamed at the same time

"Extraordinary, it's scientifically impossible, implausible even" Brennan looked down

Zack said nothing because…. Well…. he fainted.

Brennan let go and fell again she spread out her fingers and a white web like substance went from her hand to the ceiling, she then hung upside down

"HEY it's spider bones!" Booth laughed

"spider bones spider bones doing whatever a spider bones does can she swing from a web yes she can cos' she's spider BONES" they all started singing together

While Brennan swung around the lab with her newly found power.

We knew she was smart but this is just WOAH!!

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K told you it would be short but all well I it just came in to my crazy little head so I thought I'd write it down R&R plz it helps me and Mr. giggles think ;-) R&R


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